I have often wondered how to get my story out there. Here is
my testimony of how my child’s parents worked together for the good of the
child. I am the custodial parent in our situation. We have an
inter-state case between PA and VA. This makes the child support rather
difficult to maneuver especially if I don’t agree with the enforcement court
hearings being processed. I worked very hard to make sure my son had a
relationship with his father. His father did not have a car or license at
our separation. At first, I admit I was upset that the judge made me drive our
child for visitation the whole way and back without compensation, without
support payments being kept up. I patiently did my duty for more than a
year at which time I felt the father should make some effort in the
transportation as it was wearing me out.
We meet about halfway ever since without any disputes over
dates times or length of visits. We cordially speak regarding our child in
order to keep him informed.
Now I am remarried and I am seeing the non-custodial side of
things with my current husband. His ex is allowed to manipulate the visitation,
the child, every holiday, medical expenses, etc in whatever manner she sees
fit. She continually harasses my husband with ignorant phone calls and court
hearings. We recently were taken to court for missing a soccer game due to a
planned, prior agreed upon, family trip to Gettysburg, which is educational in
nature. The court actually sided with her! I am still in shock. We are
not allowed to be a family or take trips unless she agrees but she can renig on
the agreement and take us to court later! This is preposterous! I feel
like the child support and custody courts allow her to harass my husband.
I am counting down the years until this child is 18 and I
can tell her to go away and kiss my behind!
I feel the law needs to change towards non-custodial parents
and stop treating them like they are the “bad guys”. Also I feel the law
should give equal parenting – such as change who the custodial parent is around
the age of 10 or 11. I just feel the system fails both sides of the custody
which means it is failing our children.
People need to learn to suck it up, humble yourself, and do
what is best for your child which is have both parents in their life.
I hope my testimony of how I manage
my custody in a nice respectful manner will help someone see that it can be
done without the courts.
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